I've lost the ability to do anything, whenever I try to ask myself why I get distracted.

 Phone conversation:

"So before the party I went to my sugar daddy's place. I wanted money, so I agreed to let him watch me fuck myself with a dildo. In the ass."

"You didn't have sex?"

"I don't like him touching me."

"Nice."

"Yeah. Then I got dressed and got ready for that retard party I was telling you about, the one at that creek. Have I told you about the creek?"

"No."

"Doesn't matter. I smoked and then left with my friend."

"You don't smoke weed."

"I know. Weed's for fat bitches, it was meth."

The children I nanny are extremely interested in Youtube videos featuring topics such as 'world's largest', 'world's most expensive', 'world's worst', 'fattest', and 'coolest'. They have outgrown their interest in creatures and magic, but still have a strong desire for the fantastical. These videos often mention 'mega-mansions', 'cyber-trucks', and '500,000 dollar YouTube giveaways'. The concept of the fantastical has shifted from magical and fictional creatures to a focus on extreme wealth. It's fascinating. This exposure might lead the children to believe that they are not wealthy (although they are), as their entertainment consists of individuals with excessive possessions that they do not have.

The fundamental priorities of these kids are not mixed up. They still want the same things and want to feel the same emotions. However, their expression and communication of these needs may differ from previous generations, making it challenging to bridge the generational gap.

Foreign developmental processes always seem sinister at first, and youth is eternally threatening.

Optimism?

When weakness becomes a virtue, strength becomes evil, and faith no longer heals, what good comes from belief? 

The red line train in Chicago has a voyeuristic undertone at night. It's subversion incites fear in many and is under appreciated.

 Girl's girls fascism.

Instinctually, I get sick of the cool weather very quickly. I crave it at first, and then I experience anticipatory dread. This clouds my fall vibe. SUCKS! I want to enjoy it, but I don't think I can. It was the coldest it's been all season today, and I woke up to hail hitting my window. I am filled with fear.

I was watching Eyes Wide Shut with Caroline a few days ago and that 

warm apartment with the 

dark wood and 

rich reds and the 

body Nicole Kidman has and the

products displayed in her bathroom and the

rainbow Christmas lights and the 

bright blue coming from the windows and contrasting the warm interior 

is winter at its most romantic.